Mawwage (What Bwings Us Togeva Today)

06.07.08

2009-09-15T19:14:00.000-07:00

Well, better late than never?

I had wanted to wear my hair curly and free, but there was no way the Michigan summer was going to allow for that. Thus, my record for sweltering hot weather parties remained unbroken, and my hair was straightened for the first time ever.

I am wearing a robe my soon-to-be husband's grandfather brought back from Japan in 1946. Hair by Lanna.

I was dressed soon enough, and my lovely maids and I gathered in the garden.

Friends, Sisters, Daughter

I am wearing my mother's veil. The dress is a vintage eBay find that I could not have made work without the loving talent from Linda Neal, Seamstress and best friend's mother. Originally, my maids were all supposed to wear different shades of blue in different styles, but my sister and blonde friend inadvertently bought the same dress five states apart from each other. They look great, don't they?

I was ten minutes late for my wedding. I didn't think to wait for the photographer because there was a bitchy old woman at the door tapping her foot at me. Bryan teased me mid-ceremony about it. Here is me telling him, before God and family, to shut up.

The church was built in the 1970's and has infamously ugly carpet. However, I love the streamlined, Frank Lloyd Wright-esque simplicity of the church and felt that even the carpet could not detract from the beauty of the altar, wood focal points, and the gentle presence of God amid the love of our friends and family.

And then there we were - Mr. and Mrs. at long last!

We had a long break between the ceremony and the party. Some went back to our parents' homes, some went to the bar early, and we stopped here and there for some photos along M-59 in Pontiac, MI.

President Tuxedo, 12 Oaks Mall in Novi, messed up the tuxes to a ridiculous degree, but the groomsmen and lady were badass all the same.

Then, it was time to PARTY!

We booked the lower level of Clutch Cargo, a local multi-level club in a former Lutheran church with a storied reputation that had recently been bought back by a former owner, Amir Daiza, and rehabbed into this spectacular space:

It was a wonderful time, memorable and still talked about by our friends today.

My best girlfriend bustles me up.

Our caterers and our photographer canceled on us the week of the wedding - we dined on Buffalo Wild Wings, White Castle Sliders, and Highland House salad and breadsticks. Everyone said it was the best wedding food they had ever eaten, and they must have meant it because it was GONE.

We did individual cheesecakes, cupcakes, and lemon meringue pie.

The speeches had the right blend of humor and sap to make everyone laugh and cry. See? I almost ate my husband's face, I was laughing so hard:

At the end of the day, though, no matter all the drama and fun times, the most important thing that happened was that I married my best friend.

All captured by the talented Michael Ferguson of Photo Impressions.

Guess what happened the following February?

the story continues at boingerhead, the blog.

tagged

2008-06-06T06:47:00.000-07:00

122Lovesme tagged me!

Four Things You Don't Know About Mr. Mawwage:

1. He is afraid of spiders, and freaks out if he thinks there is one present. I'm talking dancing, shrieking, throwing things at the poor arachnid. I will then catch it in my hands and find a safe place for it outside, where it can eat the bugs.

2. He used to play serious hockey and his calf muscles are gigantic.

3. He is a great daddy. I believe he loves my children more than he loves me.

4. When he goes out, he texts me love notes that become increasingly abbreviated as the night wears on...
"I love you!"
"I luv yu!"
"I luv u!!"
"I :) u !@"
and it makes me laugh.

Tomorrow is my wedding day. I can't even begin to tell you how awesome my toes look.
With heat in the upper 80's and high humidity, I"m pretty sure my hair is going to look awesome, too - like Buckwheat awesome.

a dress that isn't

2008-05-29T21:12:00.000-07:00

Long stories short: we have rings, we have shoes, we have a photographer, we have flowers, all we need is to make sure we have train fare for Bryan to get into town Thursday!

In lieu of an actual post, because my brain is short-circuiting on a daily basis, just for Peonies and Poloroids, here is one of the two dresses that ain't!

This actually my fault. The listing agent, I could have sworn, had this listed as a modern M/L. I was hoping by the lines of the gown and excess silk it could be altered. But it's a modern size two, so no dice.

Photo: coutureallure (links to eBay store)

first today, then tomorrow

2008-05-26T12:38:00.001-07:00

I was wondering what I'm going to do with this blog after the wedding. Originally it was meant for family and friends, but I think my bridesmaid Jill is the only one of those who actually reads it (Jill! Post here instead of sending email responses - it ups my popularity!)

So as I mentioned in a previous post, I'm taking the blog into an actual direction. I'm going to plan mini-weddings and feature new and upcoming vendors - read: those not charging $$$$ yet but offering $$$$ quality - as I find them. Each event will come in near or under $5,000 and will focus on not only the big day, but the purpose of the big day. I'm so tired of the Big Day mentality - ya'll need to understand what comes next is the rest of your life as a duo, not an uno, and some of that should be covered better.

But that's tomorrow. I'm off my soapbox. Today, it's my wedding I'm worrying about. In no particular order...

Dress - I will be wearing no jewelry. I opted to wear my mother's veil, which is perfect with my dress. I've lost 1-3 inches at each measurement, so I think with my industrial-strength undergarments, my dress just might be loose. I got my shoes - they are not what anyone, least of all me, expected but I can't wait to see pictures. Except...

Photographer - we ain't got one. If I have one piece of advice, it's to never use friends for anything big. Ever.

Flowers -I have no idea what they look like. My mother, aunts 1 and 3, and my grandmother had a sleepover at my mom's and took them apart. They went and bought more silks and remade the bouquets to their liking. Now, many (most?) brides would have flipped out at the very idea, but I know those women have impeccable taste and if my mother says they look better, I know they look beautiful. She took before and after photos.

Food - Going to require a little orchestration because we're ordering from five different places, of which only two are delivering. Not going to lie though - I'm worrying about the cake/cupcakes tower. I can't believe what a tremendous flake the cake lady is turning out to be!

Music - Need to burn our specific songs for the DJ, and we need to finalize the mother/son and father/daughter dance.

License - I've got to get to Michigan by June 1 and apply for it. My parents can pick it up for me, but I've got to apply for it. I just know we're going to have a wedding but not be married for weeks afterward because we failed to do this.

Programs and Photo Sharing Info - it's done, just needs to converted to .pdf and emailed to myself so I can print them at my mother's house that weekend.

Rehearsal - out of our hands. It's at his parents' and we are just hoping for clear weather so we can have a good, relaxing time.

Transportation - we were planning on more people staying at the hotel and paying for a shuttle to and from, but since only one person has so far made a reservation, we can't see paying $60 for a huge shuttle bus for one person. I've already decided I'm not drinking much, so I will just make sure everyone has a safe ride.

Rings - still waffling and don't have those either.

You want to know the truth? My biggest emotion right now is JOY. When it looked like the reception was reduced to PBR and hot dogs in someone's backyard, I felt intense joy that I did not care! We are getting married and that's all that matters! (well, if I get the license, anyway!)

two weeks to go

2008-05-24T19:23:00.001-07:00

In the last week, we have had some highly stressful situations arise and we could not have dealt with them without the abiding, exasperated love and support of our parents and friends.

The good news is that wedding reception is on as planned.

The bad news is that we're going into debt to have it be so, which is one thing we were so sure we were going to be able to avoid doing. If I weren't so concerned about the government watching us I'd go ahead and say all the vile things I hope befall the IRS. Although I am not a conspiracy theorist, I'm not taking chances.

The other good news is that I have a secret. :) !! I should be able to share my secret within the next two weeks. (No, Mom, I'm not pregnant, and I don't care if you had another fish dream, I'm not gonna be pregnant either!)

I was going to write a to-do list, but instead I'm going to pull a Scarlett O'Hara and think about it tomorrow.

Enjoy your holiday weekend!

Photo: dusdin, polanoid.net

the dress has been altered

2008-05-18T21:25:00.000-07:00

And......it......FITS! Like a glove! A perfectly tailored, custom-made silk and satin pearl-encrusted glove!

I can't wait to get pictures of me, me, me in this dress.

My mom rocks. She was all ready to go on a shopping rampage and get me another dress if it didn't work out. Thank goodness it didn't come to that. I don't think anything of it, but for some reason most people give me a funny look when they find out I've bought five wedding dresses. I bought and then resold two so that was more of a business decision with some actual profit involved. I kept one of those original three as backup, bought and will likely donate a vintage size 0 gown that was listed as a size "M/L-ish" on eBay, and the fifth, the The Dress, has been let out to accommodate the bounty of my figure and so, no more dresses for me! Yay!

I saw my mom's dress and my sister's dress and I think it's really funny that they are similar styles when they haven't shopped together in more than ten years.

This coming week, I'll be taking a new direction with my blog and that will be to plan weekly mini-weddings with budgets of less than $5,000 in mind. Since I live in Chicago and I grew up in Detroit, most of the ideas and resources will draw from those two locations but should translate to most any locale.

Happy Monday to all! I am three weeks from taking my last walk as me shortly followed by my first walk as me + him.

:)

Hey this jumbo butt bow, will make a nifty rescue flag.

2008-05-16T06:20:00.001-07:00

-Deirdre Flint, The Bridesmaid Dress Song

I have been a bridesmaid three times. Each time I was in the unique situation of the bride paying for everything. The first two weddings were close together and I was a destitute, newly divorced mother; in the last, she remembered $300 she owed me from ten years ago that I had totally forgotten about. Even-stevens! Now, as the bride, I was lucky enough that my best friend's mother is a seamstress who knew of a going-out-of-business sale (dresses 1-3) and then found a few gems on eBay (dresses 4 & 5) for less than $50 each.

So, the budgets of my bridesmaids has been foremost in my mind from the beginning. Reading sites like theknot.com and brides.com and the many other sites and high fashion blogs out there sets a daunting task of making a wedding so personal...it ends up like everyone else's anyway. I don't think most women are up to the huge pressure of a wedding these days. It seems like we've pegged ourselves into ridiculous expectations no matter what our personal visions are. It's a cream puff princess wedding, an organic diy adventure, something in between? There are so many books, magazines, photo blogs, inspiration blogs...it's overwhelming. It's fine to look at the pretty pictures, but how is the average girl supposed to put on a party in the style of Vogue or Brides in small town America? In this economy?

I don't think I have many readers, but since I am mostly done with the planning and am now in the execution stages (less than one month to go!) I am going to devote the next week or so of blog entries to deals and steals for those brides who want style and flair but can't spend more than $ to get it.

To start, I'm going to tell you what I did for my maids: I gave them near-carte blanche. I told them they could wear whatever they wanted as long as it fell within a range of blue.

No matchy-matchy required. The color is the cohesive element; the most important thing to me is that each lady's personal style and beauty be able to shine through. I know one girl chose a soft black; another a royal blue sheath; another a royal blue and purple strappy grecian gown.

My greatest gift to my maids has been, I hope, to allow them to save money and time by choosing individual styles that met the demands of their pocketbooks and can be worn again.

Next entry will be devoted to bridesmaid dresses and accessory ideas.

i am a postaholic

2008-05-15T17:59:00.000-07:00

$5 products for $5 from E.L.F. - how is you haven't gotten yours yet??

Oh yeah, they are out of stock. Well, pick up any of these other $1-$5 deals or just peruse the Looks for ideas on your wedding day style. There is a Bridal pre-designed kit that comes with pretty cosmetics and look-saving tools, including a travel mirror, shine eraser, blending brushes, lip glaze, etc. in a very pretty bag. For $8. Total.

the dress and photos of my shower

2008-05-15T16:05:00.000-07:00

I have to give serious thanks to my best friend and (matron) of honor, Heather, for the shower she put on for me with our friend Kat. I was reluctant to have one because this is my second marriage and we've been together for a couple years now, but she insisted because it is my first wedding. Heather just finished her last year of law school (whoot! she's a woman of the horse, now!) but she managed to study for finals, become godmother to my children, and whip up this party in one weekend.

I'm so glad she did.

Kat and Mrs. J lined tables with pretty flowers nestled in paper bags that had been cut with decorative shears. My daughter loved these and would have kept each one if she could have finagled it.

Then Heather whipped up three different kinds of quiche to go with assorted cheeses and crackers, dips and chips, fruit salad, chocolate goodness, and sandwich fixins'. Here she is next to the buffet which was the very piece of furniture purchased for the apartment we shared after high school.

Here are some photos of me making strange faces:

I had a great time seeing my aunts, grandmother, and cousins and also Bryan's cousins. Bryan was so happy to be blessed with many new kitchen gadgets and I was very happy to see our tent since we're planning on doing a lot of camping on our honeymoon :)

This weekend we find out if The Gown can be altered to accommodate my bizzums.* Cross your fingers for me. Because if it can't be altered, we'll have ivory everything except for something like this blindingly white huge chiffon nightmare:

{Photo: Theknot.com}

*Funny story ... once upon a time my daughter had a high fever and was a wee bit out of her head with it. She was staring at one of my mother's Victorian monstrosities of a lamp and kept saying, "It's a lady.....see the pretty lady?" I didn't know what she was talking about and she finally mumbled, "a lady, mama....see her bizzums?"

"What are bizzums?"

"You know....like what you have...bizzums."

~blank stare........staring at lamp.....oh my - "

"You mean bosoms?"

"Bizzums....bosoms....whatever....I don't have any, that's for sure."

And now we just always call them bizzums.

cake, showers, and strippers

2008-05-15T05:04:00.000-07:00

{Photo from HoldTheFlour}

If you visit HoldtheFlour's profile you will find a sweet idea for shower gifts for brides and new mamas. This would be easy to recreate on your own if you are on a tight budget, but at $59 this kitchen cake is pretty reasonable.

Idosugar.com's contributor is planning a shower for her friend and sharing all her ideas with her readers. The menu they came up with sounds pretty yummy, but then when you insert fancy words in the right places, anything can sound yummy - Mushroom Ragu on Chevre Crostini sounds a lot better than Fungus Salad on Toasted Bread.

Speaking of showers, this clip from Glumbert by way of Idosugar.com, made me almost wet myself with laughter. I've never understood watching a woman dance naked with a group of your male friends anyway.

glumbert - Erotic Dancer

greeting, flowers, shoes, and bacon

2008-05-11T07:10:00.000-07:00

I am a little scatterbrained today.

First, Happy Mother's Day to all my mommy readers!

First, I am ordering silk flowers last-minute from Afloral.com (Thank you to the now famously chic Vintage99 for the link) which means an idea I had needs to be decided on today. My thought is that as lovely as these $1.49 corsages are, a broach will, in theory, last forever, and is more personal. The only problem is that although my mother loves to collect jewelry, she doesn't actually wear it. At the same time, she wouldn't exactly go around wearing a corsage either, now would she?

Okay, so again thanks to Vintage99 I am on Pugster.com looking at some really pretty broaches that are well within our price range.

An aside on brooches. Future Husband, according to dictionary.com, broach, a/k/a brooch, can be pronounced [brohch, brooch] so I am just as right as you are.

The flowers I am choosing are sooo inexpensive. Everything is coming less than $65 including shipping. Silk flowers are not always incredibly realistic unless you pay $$$ for them but here is my list arguing in favor of silks for my wedding:

I am allergic to flowers, especially roses, lilies, carnations, and baby's breath.
Flowers are important, but not a priority. I have a backup box of Oriental Trading Company parasols.
Silks can photograph better.
Real flowers die or become dust-catching dried flower arrangements.
Silks can be recycled into other projects, resold to another bride, or if kept as arrangements in the home, can be washed.
Silks are cheaper when done on a budget.

I am going with all white arrangements with pearl accents.

A word or seven on shoes: I can't make up my own mind.

Zappos in the $60-90 range, neither of which are blowing up my skirt but look comfortable and have a low heel:

Piperlime has these in the way-too-damn-expensive-to-sweat-in range:

J. Crew in the same price range, but the color is perfect:

And then there are these too-fun selections from pinupgirlclothing.com

And now, a few funny things I have come across in my online meanderings:

I know, bacon has nothing to do with anything, but that makes me laugh.

look what i did

2008-05-10T14:21:00.000-07:00

candid photo shots

2008-05-10T08:09:00.000-07:00

I know I have come across other brides setting up online photo galleries for their guests to visit and share photos, but I can't find a single one now! It's scary how much I am relying on other people's great ideas because now that I can't find the details on this great idea and have to figure it out myself I am worrying.

Which site?
How best to get the word out?
Will people do it?
Should I put out SASE/CD cases at the reception instead?

Candid shots are important to me. I hate posed shots. I'd rather do without a portrait photographer, to be honest. I can't recall a single formal wedding portrait where I didn't glaze over and move on to the next shot. Even my best friend's wedding - my favorite pictures were the ones my mother got, when we were milling around waiting to be posed.

photo: innocentjoy.blogspot.com

So, I am leaning toward a photobucket account and I'm going to make cards with instructions for guests to access the account and upload their photos. I don't have a universal cardreader, or I'd just bring a laptop and cardreader as suggested over at weddingbee.com

I came across this dude in Mission Viejo, CA that makes me wish I lived there just so he could do my wedding. Bryan is in charge of photography because he is a photographer. I am equal parts relieved and nervous about that because I am equal parts control freak and don't care. But the dude's name is Becker.

Candid shots can be a double-edged sword, though

i heart cupcakes. and knives.

2008-05-09T17:40:00.000-07:00

One of the best things about living in Chicago is the fact that places like Mojo Spa are walking distance. There is so much more in the storefront than is featured on the website. I am thinking about picking up some cupcake soaps for my ladies.

I have to thank East Side Bride for turning me on to peonies and polaroids. I love her approach. This post from the other day had me in stitches.

Is there a such thing as too much cupcake?

mmmmmmm yum. This is what we're having in lieu of cake:

The Dance

2008-05-07T18:06:00.000-07:00

Yes.....THAT dance...

The first dance with Bryan as my husband is giving me almost as much of a headache as the first dance with my dad.

I know my dad and I will have no problem rocking out but I can't decide on a song.
Bryan and I had no problem choosing a song, but I am worried about the dancing.

I have been poring over *free* online video blurbs with dance tips and moves. The following are some of my favorites.

Talk about your vintage fancy-freaking footwork!

Of course I'm no Cyd and he's no Fred....but...damn that looks fun.

You forget how much people used to smoke until you watch the old movies.

2008-05-07T04:48:00.000-07:00

My bridesmaid and sister is concerned that the wording on my invites - which I still need to post! - isn't clear enough re: food and timing.

The wording says, "swanky small plates and cocktail reception to follow" (actually it says "foller" but that's a whole other post) because:

a. I love the word swanky although I am catching endless crap about it from my friends and future brother-in-law
b. I wanted to emphasis that this is a dress-up, but not black tie, fun, nightclub, cocktail lounge
c. I wanted to be clear that there is no formal dinner, but there will be food. Small plates means small plates of lots of different food, not one plate of bar snacks but definitely not a formal sit-down dinner or dinner buffet. Cocktail = open bar!

So, if my guests are reading this, rest assured that if you make the drive to our reception, you will be well fed with the yummiest of our favorite Michigan restaurants while you will dance and rock out to our favorite Chicago DJ's, and enjoy a top shelf expanded premium bar!

I am actually really excited about the food concept we came up with. It will be interesting to see peoples' reactions when they find out where all the food came from. Mwahaha!

One Last Thing!

2008-05-01T23:04:00.000-07:00

My people are less punk, but this is my dream bridal party:

photo from wedding porn off Offbeatbride.com (amandabrooksphotography)

I love the non-matchiness and I love the groomsladies. Since Bryan is having his dear friend Angela on his side, I wanted to throw this photo up for her.

Roll Call: Favorite Blogs With A Side of Crazy

2008-05-01T22:17:00.000-07:00

I was checking out one of my favorite places to go, Kim Calakoutis' Visual Guide, and I couldn't help but chuckle at the disgruntled expressions on the faces of the audience in the first few photos.

Then I went over to absolutelybeautifulthings and saw this gem.

Just reminded me so much of my own monsters that I had to jump up and kiss their sweaty, sleeping faces.

At Brenda's, I read the following excerpted gem from Stacey Wolf's Never Throw Rice at a Pisces:

Aquarius: Do something funny and unconventional. Sing a duet, plan some group line dances, or ride away on a Harley. Your wedding will delight your guests, people will be talking about it forever.

I am thinking of all the things we're doing differently and my concern is if we went any more off the trail, people would turn around and leave thinking they'd walked into someone else's party. The only thing wedding-like about our reception is going to be me, in the big white dress.

Mriou, Ann-Margaret for Triumph

Speaking of big white dress.....I have to confess that I am having a really hard time not posting pictures of it. Thing is, I gave the link to this blog to all of my guests and I don't want anyone to see my dress until the big day. I know it won't be to everyone's taste and I just don't want to risk comments that I may take to heart. Bryan made me promise not to buy any more dresses.

I can't decide what to dance to with my dad. There is a shortage of non-incestuous songs that aren't still so mushy they make me throw up in my mouth a little. My father is no help. He suggested Surfin' Bird.

I am having hair concerns, too.

This is what I want:

This is what I'm going to have:

Photo courtesy of hairselect.com

But no matter what, when I start to freak out, I go to this nerve-relaxing article at Etsy detailing the author's last-minute wedding. I pray in my heart that we are as cool as they are.

Invites are Done and Doner!

2008-04-27T12:13:00.000-07:00

I can't even begin to tell you how extraordinarily proud of ourselves we are today. We got our diy invites into the mail yesterday at the six-week mark. They do look great; we are now expert stampers. But there is a little bit of a back story that I'm not sure how much to reveal.

Anyone who knows me will not be shocked to learn that the invites were done last-minute, in a rush, with lots of hair-yanking and groaning involved. I should change the name of this blog to "How {Not} to Plan a Wedding!"

Some things were not our fault - a friend with good intentions who couldn't keep a promise; snobby printers refusing to use our paper. Some things most definitely were - misprints, typos, forgetting to put the addresses for the venues anywhere on any printed material and needing to reprint all the maps last-minute.

Regardless, they did turn out beautiful and once everyone has had a chance to receive them, I will post a photo of our artwork.

My mother called me while I was stuffing envelopes to ask me about my daughter's communion dress for next weekend. I told her it was under control, which is Natalese for what dress? She asked me WHY do I always leave things until the last minute? I told her - I can't make up my mind when faced with too many choices. My brain blows a fuse. I worry incessantly that I made a poor choice. So, I wait until the last minute and then systematically have choices removed for me. Then I can be happy with my choice and cease worrying that there was one last elusive choice I missed.

My mom thinks that's a load of horse hooey and she might be right. In this instance, it works out because the invites did turn out good, we did make the 6 week deadline, and my daughter can wear my communion dress (it's vintage!)

Two Very Cool Things

2008-04-17T17:08:00.000-07:00

In the last few weeks, several things fell though - either because of my own procrastination or because other people couldn't follow through on a promise - but no worries! Three really cool things happened, too, and I'd rather focus on them than on the food fiasco, the flower fallout, the dress disaster, or the invitation implosion (that last didn't work, but implode is a fun word to say.)

First and foremost, my best friend through me the bitchingest wedding shower. Heather my love, you are the bee's knees!

Second, my future mother-in-law has rescued us from invitation hell.

And third, the first reference to this blog showed up on another kickass bridal blog, That Bride, who I think is definitely a Mary among Rhodas.

And now, I am off to pack for our pre-Cana Catholic Love Retreat Weekend. I'd like to take this moment to assure anyone concerned for my virtue that on this weekend retreat with my intended bridegroom, we will be staying in separate hotel rooms. I am not kidding.

This is how I feel sometimes

2008-04-06T16:27:00.001-07:00

Hoo boy

2008-04-06T10:56:00.000-07:00

My abs are killing me. But I feel sooo good.

New plan for flowers: we're going to Michaels to see about making our own silk bouquets. If I don't like what we see, we're going to the flower market that morning and making our own fresh bouquets.

And if THAT doesn't work - parasols!

In other news, we've been reconsidering favors. I saw this response on yahoo.answers:

One of the cooler favors I received was a bag of trail mix that the couple made and tied with ribbon. It said Happy Trails from the couple, and after a long night of drinking and dancing, everyone was thrilled by the little snack. It was a creative and inexpensive favor and a real crowd-pleaser.

And a couple other ideas we have: hockey pucks; thunder stick, furoshiki.

it's always something

2008-04-01T19:08:00.000-07:00

So, I was getting a deal renting silk flowers, but that fell through. They don't have any all-white blossoms. Just pink, pink, or pink.

I was looking at getting some parasols ($29.99 for twelve through oriental trading company. I really did not want that to be the only thing, though.

I saw a bouquet I liked a lot, but I'm not sure how pricy it will be. It was queen anne's lace with some other meadowish flowers that I couldn't identify. Damn it.

The Bridesmaids

2008-03-31T17:14:00.000-07:00

I am kicking around ideas for bridesmaids gifts. I do not have great taste in jewelry for other people, so I am leaning away from jewelry and clothing and more toward this adorable thing from papersource.com:

with one of these compacts from Sweet Sinner Creations at Etsy.

and then possibly some of the handmade soaps available. I'm not sure on that because I know two of my maids are very sensitive and I'd hate to give them something that would make them rashy.

Apropos of nothing, True Grit is on and I love me some John Wayne.

Fitsugar and the Dress

2008-03-31T05:58:00.000-07:00

I (cough) bought another dress (cough) again off eBay, this time a gown with a photo of the size tag and body-mannequin measurements. It was $31.00 and I am hoping/praying/screaming that this dress works. I promised Almosthusband that I wouldn't buy any more dresses.

I came across a sweet site that is kind of like iVillage only it seems less neurotic, more fun. Today I tried out three of their exercise videos (an ab workout and a booty workout and an arm workout.)

What do I like about these videos? They are short, straightforward, and did I mention short? It is impossible to not have five minutes to run through a couple of these sets. I appreciate the clear instructions and did I mention they are short?

Doesn't mean I don't feel it.

i do not have a wedding dress

2008-03-30T11:05:00.000-07:00

One of my favorite blogs, style me pretty, is a huge proponent of inspiration boards. I may have posted one before, I'm not sure.

However, I am having a major issue with my wedding dress so if I did post a board, it's been completely changed.

See, my mom bought me three wedding dresses for $100 each from a bridal salon that had closed its doors. I sold two for more than $300. I kept one. It's a very beautiful dress. It's also a very big dress. It's a very big, very beautiful dress. I stress big.

I stress big because quite frankly, I can't quite move in it. Since I want to be able to shake a tail feather at my own wedding, it's just too much.

I took a risk on buying a gorgeous vintage gown off eBay. It was $57 (so technically I still haven't paid for a dress) and when it came last night I was thrilled that it was every bit as gorgeous as the photographs, and seriously depressed to find that is was about four sizes smaller than advertised (not to mention the undisclosed bleach spots on the back.)

Back to the drawing board on the dress...and back to the drawing board on the inspiration board.

I want to make my board more interesting and include some of the surprises we have in store for our guests. Bryan has gotten some great deals on Polaroid cameras. Our guestbook is going to consist of Polaroid shots of our guests. I was looking for some webshots of the film and I came across this great site, Polanoid.com where they are growing the largest collection of Polaroid photographs. Here are some of my favorites, along with the image above:

i love this

2008-03-30T10:23:00.001-07:00

i carry your heart with me

i carry your heart with me (i carry it in
my heart)

i am never without it (anywhere
i go you go, my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)

i fear no fate (for you are my fate,my sweet)

i want no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)

and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)

ee cummings

I have no idea what this is

2008-03-29T21:02:00.000-07:00

http://www.enlighted.com/pages/whitecorset.shtml

Taking the Cake

2008-03-25T16:43:00.001-07:00

I am having planning withdrawals. So let's go window-shopping.

The wedding is a mix of vintage-retro 40's/50's flair and I am trying to find a caketopper that reflects that without being too over the top old.

Some possibilities here, if I were willing to spend so much (I'm not) Gulden & Brown

Kewpie doll, anyone?

Weddingmountain.com is definitely Caketopper Heaven, as well as for every other kind of cheap usual wedding stuff nonsense.

None of those are really "doing it" for me, though.

Stopping by etsy.com yielded disappointing results, for the first time ever. Maybe I'm just not using the right search criteria.

Anyway, there were all these really gorgeous caketoppers on eBay and at fancyflours.com but none of them are really blowing up my skirt.

I will look more, tomorrow.

How To Have Your Photo Taken on the Ice at Joe Louis Arena

2008-03-17T16:09:00.000-07:00

Photo: Dave Reginek

Step 1: Be good to your future brother-in-law so when he is a new media intern for the Detroit Red Wings, he will finagle five minutes on the ice with the team photographer.

That was really all there was to it on our end. All the credit for this too-cool moment goes to the best Best Man ever.

And damn, we look good.

Wedding Cake Looks Like Bride

2008-03-12T19:31:00.000-07:00

This creeps me out.

Do as I say, not what I said

2008-03-09T12:07:00.000-07:00

Technically this is a song about someone walking out on their family. But I'd like you to pay attention to the imagery of the wedding videoed for the song.

Get There!

2008-03-02T17:51:00.000-08:00

Bryan and I have been screwing around online all weekend...okay, I have been...and we came across weddingmapper.com . We have a lot of out of town guests coming in (we hope) and this is going to be a great tool to help them find their way around.

There's a hole in my bucket, dear Liza

2008-03-01T13:48:00.001-08:00

I was really excited about a great deal I found online until I discovered the website has a reputation for ripping off their customers.

$100 for 5 bouquets, 10 boutonnières, 4 corsages, and a throw bouquet that would be perfect for the girl. The catch is that you don't know what your product looks like until it arrives - the arrangements are made using overstock from custom orders. I'm not a total control freak, so when the site adds 15% off when paying with a money order or personal check and free shipping for regular mail, I'm willing to make some concessions...wait, you get a discount if you DO pay with a personal check? Isn't that odd in the digital age. Like my dad says, it sounds slicker than snot on a doorknob. I checked out Canada's version of the BBB and the complaints were serious.

So I have decided to forgo purchasing silks from budget-bride.com and am letting my coordinator work out a deal with a woman she knows who rents.

I would like to keep some of the flowers - The Girl loves flowers, so she is getting her own bouquet as well as a flower headpiece. Me, now, I'm not a flower person so I really can't justify spending loads of money on something that is going to die or collect dust. If I can rent at a decent rate, I'll do it.

In the meantime, I found a great deal at save-on-crafts.com where the bouquets are extremely affordable and appear to be beautiful. I am going to have the grooms use silk handkerchiefs instead of boutonnières (mostly because I really hate trying to remember to spell boutonnières) and then just will need four corsages for our mothers, the lone female groom, and Tab.

Apropos of nothing:
The food whore is my new hero. And I totally swiped this from her blog:

Michael's opinion? "That little girl is cute, but she's so wrong."

We Picked Out Our Music Today

2008-02-25T17:34:00.001-08:00

Inspiration Board

2008-02-24T15:52:00.000-08:00

One of my favorite blogs to read, style me pretty, is very keen on inspiration boards. Her opinion is that it will help the bride keep on the set path of style she has chosen for herself.

It must work because this creative process is every bit as painful as giving birth.

Any way, in my search to find a digital image of a pair of earrings I adore I came across overstockjeweler.com:

List Price: $524.99
Their Price: $174.99

They reproduce items inspired by celebrity designs with prices more equitable to the unwashed masses like myself.

These gorgeous South Sea oyster shell pearl earrings are only $34.99

I have a Poofball Dress

2008-02-24T07:36:00.000-08:00

The only time I realize what a digital age we live in is when I need to send something to someone's house. And actually put pen to paper and do so. Even my father will shoot off an email before he'll pick up the phone.

I had my father snap off a few photos of me in my dress because I keep forgetting what it looks like. It is a beautiful dress, but there a couple things I had forgotten about it. First, it's a big white poofball with a full Cathedral length train. It would be perfect for the wedding we were planning when my parents bought it for me two years ago - St. Anne Cathedral, Rennaissance Club, etc. But we've shifted to a more mod shindig and the dress...let's just say it will be like plopping Cinderella down in the middle of Rowan & Martin's Laugh-In.

We're debating on selling it and using the proceeds for a more appropriate dress or marrying in the poofball dress and partying in a different one.

With the guest list finalized, the venues for ceremony and reception set and contracts signed, it seems like all the big stuff is done and now we just need to do all the little stuff.

A Wee Rant

2008-02-20T16:21:00.000-08:00

First, an apology. It's so easy to pass judgement on weddings when it isn't your wedding that is in question. I have to say that I owe a big thumbs up to my friends and family who have suffered my ingratitude in the past because quite frankly, this wedding business sucks and I have either laughed at or critisized other peoples' decisions when I had no idea what they were going through to make me, their guest, happy. Yes, Heather, my love, that means you, too. I thought your excel sheets were overboard and that you were, while not a Bridezilla, a total control freak. But now I understand.

It's no wonder it's a multi-billion dollar industry. I sent an inquiry to one planning site over a year ago and since then I have been inundated with email and junk mail from photographers, videographers, bakeries, venues, invitationers, calligraphers, favor and trinket sites, florists, limousine services, and lord knows what else.

It begs the question - is all this really necessary? I don't think so, but my email inbox begs to differ. My Irish-Italian Super-American culture is telling me that unless I provide all kinds of stuff and meals and entertainment and whatever, my guests will feel unwanted and unloved, used and tricked, and the memory of my poor hostessing will forever taint the relationships I have with my family and loved ones! Oh my God!

I'd like to think that the people in our lives know better! But I can't be sure, so what we've been doing as a litmus test is asking ourselves, "Who is served by this?" And if the answer isn't "me and him" or "it isn't going to hurt us, annoy us, or blow our budget" or "we must do this to be good hosts" then we're not going to worry about it.

Who is served by favors?
Who is served $$$$ worth of flowers?
Who is served by disposable cameras/other doo-dads?
Who is served by the money dance?

Aside: I have always thought this was uber tacky, but then I read on etiquettehell.com where a bride's future mother-in-law was explaining the origin of the money dance and I now find it not only tacky but comically creepy. In her words:

So, onto the history of the Money Dance, Polish style: At a wedding reception, the grandmother of the bride would find an old silver serving tray, preferably one that was very worn down from much use and cleaning. She would hold it in the folds of her apron. Men would come up with large coins and HURL them down at the tray. THIS (my MIL would say with a BIG SMILE) was symbolic of the men (that is plural - group effort here folks) breaking the Bride's Hymen and ending her Virginity!!!! With time, between the weight of the coins piling up, and the force of them being hurled, the tray would SNAP. It was said that the size of the pile of the coins was a testament to the groom's er... Equipment (larger the pile, more to work with I guess), and the longer it took to snap the tray, the more virtuous the Bride was, and harder she would fight off her husband in fear of the unknown on their wedding night. (I.e. if bride is a hussy, she would give in right away, therefore if she was a hussy, the tray would snap right away.) By the men collectively breaking it first, they were symbolically getting the 'painful and unpleasant' part of the wedding night out of the way so the groom and bride could enjoy themselves. Once emigrated to the US, the coins became silver dollars, and in the depression, there was no way to spare a good silver tray for breaking, so it morphed into the money grab we now all know as the Money Dance.

There my mother in law stood, eyes bright, smile from ear to ear, knowing full well I couldn't turn down her request for so NOBLE a tradition. She still can't understand why I found it ever MORE offensive at that point. So, ladies, think of this if you don't see anything wrong with a Money Dance: -While you are dancing, people are symbolically betting on whether you are a slut or frigid -Men you may not know are symbolically trying to force themselves on you to end your Maidenhood -People are symbolically trying to find out the size of your husband's private parts

source

We just want a party and honestly, my goal is for everyone to have a fabulous weekend and to be as inconvenienced as little as possible.

I hope I am never too mature to...

2008-02-16T12:31:00.000-08:00

...not snicker when someone asks, earnestly, if I've sent my STD's to everyone.

Bryan found these postcards on eBay that we got for $11. They are badass and have been the inspiration for all of the font and the rest of the print work that I will be designing.

A lot of 350 postcards from the 1939 World's Fair. We're going to either wallpaper an accent wall with the rest (covered with plexiglass for protection) or use them for the guest book somehow.

I am working on addressing them. Bryan and I are bickering about formal v informal, but since I am the one doing all the writing, guess who won?

Thanks, Mum

2008-02-12T19:06:00.000-08:00

I had a really nice chat with my mum today. We talked about different reception sites and this and that. She had purchased a painting at St. John and visited the chapel there with my father. He thought it was as lovely as we did - and had the same reaction when we told him it was $1,100 for two hours of chapel, $15,000 minimum for the atrium reception (that reaction being, say what?)

According to Bryan, all the links in my first blog entry were bad. Sorry! This is why Google.com is your friend and mine.

Even though our budget has grown to a comfortable amount, we're still planning on doing a bunch of things ourselves. I started to design the invitations. I downloaded fonts inspired by our Save-The-Dates (hereafter referred to as STDs) which we are particularly proud of. Bryan found them - a batch of 350 postcards from the 1939 New York World's Fair.

I was supposed to address these tonight but ummm...I didn't. Instead, I messed around online ogling my favorite blogs and looking for ideas to steal and make my own. I know we're making our own invitations, thank-yous, response cards, menus cards, and such. I keep getting excited by the inspiring things others have done, like these too-talented-to-be-fair people:
{made by girl}
{juliet....by way of BrooklynBride}

...and then I think, what the hell am I doing? I don't know how to make invitations! We're going to be frantically calling people May 1 and have piles of paper, glue, and stencils for decades...well, if I never actually make them for the wedding, maybe I can use the material for our golden anniversary.

Mawwiage!

2008-02-11T19:34:00.000-08:00

Finally set a date...although in fairness, Bryan has set the date three or seven times already. I'm the undefeated champion flake in this household.

We spent this past weekend in Michigan visiting possible reception sites with our mothers. We have narrowed it down between two possibilities, but here, in no particular order, I present The Ones That Got Away...

The Inn at St. John's

The earnest interest of the event planner in showing us everything the Inn had to offer had just cause: the site is breathtaking, classic, and all-inclusive.

The Grosse Pointe War Memorial

Images of Scarlett O'Hara running over the grounds of Tara? You're not the only one.

We also visited Mystic Creek at Camp Dearborn (beautiful views) and my personal favorite, Ginetti's which we are planning on using somehow, someway, if not for the CC connection then because I fell in love with them.

Once we have the site finalized, we'll send out save-the-dates.

I think people will be surprised by the choices in venues.